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Recently, your child refuses to kiss his grandparents to say hello. Same with people he does not know. How to react ? The advice of Marcel Rufo, child psychiatrist.
Why do some children refuse to kiss a stranger and sometimes even a family member?
- As a parent, we often insist on this subject, saying to the children "Kiss the lady" or "Kiss me". However, a toddler may be reluctant to physically exchange his affectivity because he is ahead of the conception of modesty.
- This time is important for its development and construction, it must be respected. If this behavior occurs around 2 years, it is a little different, it is that the child enters the phase of opposition.
This situation is sometimes difficult to manage because it can be associated with rudeness. How to do ?
- Simply explain to grandmother or to the neighbor that your child refuses to kiss, that he is a little modest. But not kisses does not mean he should not say hello. Politeness is unavoidable. Your child should greet his grandmother otherwise, for example by waving his hand.
- This refusal to kiss can also occur in the baby, around 9/10 months. He will suddenly turn away from others, but this is not abnormal. He is simply anxious about the appearance of a stranger because he understood that he was different, a person in his own right. The others scare him.
- During this transient period, it is useless to force him to embrace or kiss them.
Find many other tips (500 questions / answers) from Marcel Rufo, in his bookAllo RUFO,€ 22.90, ed., Larousse.
Stéphanie Letellier
